'Positives in Negatives....

Languages used in Carnatic Music & Literature
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venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

A young woman was sitting at her dining table, worried about taxes to be paid, house-work to be done and to top it all, her family was coming over for Thanksgiving the next day. She was not feeling very thankful at that time. As she turned her gaze sideways, she noticed her young daughter scribbling furiously into her notebook. “My teacher asked us to write a paragraph on “Negative Thanksgiving” for homework today.” said the daughter, “She asked us to write down things that we are thankful for, things that make us feel not so good in the beginning, but turn out to be good after all.” With curiosity, the mother peeked into the book. This is what the daughter had written:

“I’m thankful for Final Exams, because that means school is almost over. I’m thankful for bad-tasting medicine, because it helps me feel better. I’m thankful for waking up to alarm clocks, because it means I’m still alive.”

It then dawned on the mother, that she had a lot of things to be thankful for! She thought again… She had to pay taxes but that meant she was fortunate to be employed. She had house-work to do but that meant she had her own home to live in. She had to cook for her family for Thanksgiving but that meant she had a family with whom she could celebrate.

Moral :
We generally complain about the negative things in life but we fail to look at the positive side of it. What is the positive in your negatives? Look at the better part of life this day and make it a great day...

courtesy: SIVA

Rsachi
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Joined: 31 Aug 2009, 13:54

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by Rsachi »

Lovely!

venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

Salutes to this man - a personification of positivity!!!!
Times Of India - Speaking Tree
In February 2010, I started to have difficulty lifting my arms. Over the next few months, my legs began to feel very weak and I struggled going up stairs. Finally I decided to go to the hospital. I figured they would run tests for a week, give me some meds and that would be the end of it. But the tests continued into a second week. They took samples of my spinal cord fluid and ran electromyograms, twice. It’s pretty much torture. They stick a thick needle all over the body one place at a time and ask you to flex your muscle. My shins, thighs, hands, arms, shoulders, neck, back...It was around that time I started to worry something was really wrong. But when the doctors said that I should have my parents present for the diagnosis, I thought they were just overreacting so I just had my brother there. On November 26, 2010, I was told that I have ALS — amyotrophic lateral sclerosis. ALS is a terminal disease that attacks your motor neurons, paralyzing every part of your body, eventually fatally affecting the lungs. Until then, you slowly lose mobility. The doctors went into detail, but I hardly heard a word they said. All I heard was, “Your body will slowly become paralyzed and you will die. There is no cure.” I can’t explain what that felt like. But my whole body understood that EVERYTHING about my life was about to change. My brother and I looked at each other and I silently said, “You’re kidding right…” Afterwards, my brother and I walked around the hospital. We cried, laughed, got angry and went crazy...We went to a shrine close by and prayed. I said everything from, “Please help me” to “I’m gonna kill YOU.” I felt like I was going insane. That night, I watched every video about ALS I could find online. It was hard but I knew I couldn’t run away. I wanted to learn everything I could about my new friend. I would be strangely calm and then suddenly my heartbeat would jump to 500bps. I was up all night on this roller coaster of emotions. Over the next few months and years, the disease began to take over. It moves so slowly that you don't realize it until you remember the difference compared to last week. It becomes hard to brush your teeth and shave. Then you start tripping over nothing and breaking your two front teeth. Then you sit on your sofa, not knowing that you won't be able to get up. "Being stuck" is one of the toughest challenges of this disease. It was so scary to feel my body paralyzed and completely irresponsive to my demands. Your heart starts pounding and you start sweating profusely. You know you won't be, but your mind somehow tricks you to believe that you'll be stuck there forever. I needed to do something. I wanted to start a campaign to raise awareness about ALS and find a cure. I had friends come over everyday and talk it out. The first thing was what the name of the movement should be… we went through a lot of ideas. One day I was making NIKEiDs — personalized Nike shoes — and I distinctly remember typing in “FUK ALS.” Nike didn’t accept. I tried, “KIL ALS.” Nike didn’t accept. I thought,“What do I want most?”… so I typed “END ALS.” It went through… I told my friends and coworkers, and END ALS started in January 2012. Our first mission is to find a cure. The second mission is to change policy to provide comfort in communication for people living with ALS. Technology makes all of the difference in allowing ALS patients to live as normally and comfortably as possible. For example, I use Tobii eye tracking software so I can control my computer cursor with my eyes. Japan's insurance doesn't cover it unless you can only move your eyes, but every person in need deserves it. This second mission is a means to an end for the first mission. It is to give voice back to where silenced, so patients can unite to raise awareness and demand a cure. Tobii allows me to continue to work as a planning director at McCann Erickson, an ad agency. It enables me to work on END ALS. It also lets me access Facebook, which is my main way to connect and hang with friends. It is a way for me to live my pre-ALS life through others. It can be painful to see what you’re missing out on, but it's comforting it still exists. Not to mention all of the long and short “stay strong” messages. Facebook has also put me in touch with END ALS comrades all over the world: Brazil, U.S., Canada, U.K., Norway, Germany, Taiwan, Hong Kong, Singapore and all of Japan. The wealth of information shared is invaluable. It's a powerful weapon for the global ALS community to END ALS. In January, I had to get a tracheotomy so I now breathe through a tube. This means I can no longer speak, but it does not mean I am giving up. My friends give me strength and I will keep fighting. For myself. For others. For a cure. My voice is louder now that ALS took it away. Hiro has completed a book “99% THANK YOU – Things even ALS can’t take away,” available in bookstores in Japan today. He wrote the whole book in Japanese and English with his Tobii eye tracking system. The book is available at Amazon.co.jp and soon at Kinokuniya online bookstore. The book will also be available as an electronic book so that patients like Hiro can read it. Follow Hiro on his website, blog and Facebook. ---------------Dhruvi Patel(member)

venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

A Very Inspiring Short Story About Friendship

Horror gripped the heart of a World War-I soldier, as he saw his lifelong friend fall in battle.

The soldier asked his Lieutenant if he could go out to bring his fallen comrade back... ”You can go,” said the Lieutenant, “but don’t think it will be worth it. Your friend is probably dead and you may throw your life away.”The Lieutenant’s words didn't matter, and the soldier went anyway. Miraculously, he managed to reach his friend, hoisted him onto his shoulder and brought him back to their company’s trench. The officer checked the wounded soldier, then looked kindly at his friend “, I told you it wouldn’t be worth it,” he said. “Your friend is dead and you are mortally wounded.”

“It was worth it, Sir,” said the soldier.

“What do you mean by worth it?” responded the Lieutenant.” Your friend is dead.”"Yes Sir,” the soldier answered, “but it was worth it because when I got to him, he was still alive and I had the satisfaction of hearing him say……. “Man…I knew you would come! “

We all have those people that are close to us and are special in our lives. But how many of us would be willing to save the life of a friend while giving up our own? It was once said “Greater love has no one than to lay down their life for a friend”.

Let’s all be thankful for the friends that we have and value the time that we spend with them.

venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

Married or not… you should read this...

When I got home that night my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking about divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed – dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband….

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves.

So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.”

Written by: Kimmies Floral

http://avmediastudio.com/blog/married-o ... read-this/

venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

The Fat Lady

Hi! How are you?” The woman smiled as she took the seat beside me. She had to lower herself slowly, squeezing her ample bottom into the seat, filling all available space.

Positioning herself comfortably, she plopped her enormous arm on our common armrest. Her immensity saturated the space around us, shrinking me and my seat into insignificance.

I cringed and reclined towards the window.

She leaned towards me and repeated her greeting in an upbeat, friendly voice. Her face towered above my head, forcing me to turn to look at her. “Hi,” I replied with obvious loathing.

I turned away to stare out the cabin window, sulking silently about the long hours of discomfort I was going to experience with this monster beside me.

She nudged me with her meaty arm. “My name is Laura. I’m from Britain. How about you? Japan?”

“Malaysia,” I barked.

“I’m so sorry! Will you accept my heartfelt apology? Come, shake my hand. If we’re going to spend six hours side-by-side on this flight, we’d better be friends, don’t you think?” A palm waved in front of my face. I shook the hand reluctantly, still silent.

Laura started a conversation with me, taking no notice of my unfriendly reactions. She talked excitedly about herself and her trip to Hong Kong to see her frinds. She rattled off a list of things she was going to buy for her students in the boarding school where she was teaching.

I gave her one-word answers to her questions about me. Unperturbed by my coldness, she nodded as she made appreciative comments to my answers. Her voice was warm and caring. She was considerate and obliging when we were served drinks and meals, making sure that I had room to manoeuvre in my seat. “I don’t want to clobber you with my elephant size!” she said with utmost sincerity.

To my surprise, her face which repulsed me hours before, now opened into extraordinary smiles, lively and calm at the same time. I couldn’t help but let down my guard slowly.

Laura was an interesting conversationalist. She was well read in many subjects from philosophy to science. She turned a seemingly unimportant subject into something to explore and understand. Her comments were humorous and inspirational. When our topic turned to cultures, I was pleasantly surprised by her intelligent comments and well-thought-out analysis.

During our conversation, Laura managed to make every cabin crew who served us walk away laughing at her jokes.

When a flight attendant was clearing our plates, Laura cracked several jokes about her size. The flight attendant roared with laughter as she grabbed Laura’s hand, “You really make my day!”

For the next few minutes, Laura listened attentively and gave pointers to the flight attendant’s weight problem. The grateful attendant said before she rushed off, “I’ve got to work. I’ll come back later and talk to you about it.”

I asked Laura, “‘Have you ever thought about losing some weight?”

“No. I’ve worked hard to get this way. Why would I want to give it up?”

“You aren’t worried about cardiovascular diseases that come with being overweight?”

“Not at all. You only get the diseases if you’re worried about your weight all the time. You see advertisements from slimming centres that say, ‘Liberate yourself from your extra baggage so that you are free to be yourself.’ It’s rubbish! You’re liberated only if you’re comfortable about who you are, and what you look like any time of the day and anytime of the year! Why would I want to waste my time on slimming regimes when I have so many other important things to do and so many people to be friends with? I eat healthily and walk regularly; I’m this size because I am born to be big! There is more to life than worrying about weight all day long.”

She sipped at her wine. “Besides, God gives me so much happiness that I need a bigger body to hold all of it! Why would I lose weight to lose my happiness?” Taken aback by her reasoning, I chuckled.

Laura continued. “Folks often see me as a fat lady with big bosoms, big thighs and a big bottom that no man would even bother to cast a glance at. They see me as a slob. They think I’m lazy and have no willpower. They’re wrong.” She held up her glass to a passing flight attendant. “More of this magnificent wine, please.” She smiled sweetly at the attendant. “Great service from your crew. May God bless all of you.”

She turned to me, “I’m actually a slim person inside. I’m so full of energy that people won’t be able to keep up with me. This extra flesh is here to slow me down, otherwise I’ll be running everywhere chasing after men!”

“Do men chase after you?” I asked jokingly.

“Of course they do. I’m happily married but men still keep proposing to me.

“Most of them have relationship problems and they need someone to confide in. For some reason, they like to talk to me. I think I should have been a counsellor instead of a school teacher!”

Laura paused before she said thoughtfully, “You know, the relationship between men and women is so complicated. Women worship men and call them, ‘Honey’ until they find out they have been lied to, and then they turn into bitter gourds! Men love women so much that they see them as their soul mates until they look at their credit card bills, and then women become devils with tridents!”

Laura’s enthralling conversation had turned the flight into something thoroughly enjoyable. I was also fascinated by the way people were drawn to her. By the end of the flight, almost half the cabin crew was standing near the aisle by us, laughing and joking with Laura. The passengers around us joined in the merry-making too. Laura was the centre of attention, filling the cabin with delightful warmth.

When we waved goodbye to each other at the arrival lounge at Hong Kong’s Kai Tak Airport, I watched her walking towards a big group of adoring adults and kids. Cheers sounded as the group hugged and kissed Laura. She turned around and winked at me.

I was stunned, as the realisation set in: Laura was the most beautiful woman I had ever met in my life.

By Chong Sheau Ching

A Share from .....Debbie Saporta

venkatakailasam
Posts: 4170
Joined: 07 Feb 2010, 19:16

Re: 'Positives in Negatives....

Post by venkatakailasam »

Don’t Hope,… Decide!


While waiting to pick up a friend at the airport in Portland, Oregon, I had one of those life-changing experiences that you hear other people talk about — the kind that sneaks up on you unexpectedly. This one occurred a mere two feet away from me.

Straining to locate my friend among the passengers deplaning through the jet way, I noticed a man coming toward me carrying two light bags. He stopped right next to me to greet his family.

First he motioned to his youngest son (maybe six years old) as he laid down his bags. They gave each other a long, loving hug. As they separated enough to look in each other’s face, I heard the father say, “It’s so good to see you, son. I missed you so much!” His son smiled somewhat shyly, averted his eyes and replied softly, “Me, too, Dad!”

Then the man stood up, gazed in the eyes of his oldest son (maybe nine or ten) and while cupping his son’s face in his hands said, “You’re already quite the young man. I love you very much, Zach!” They too hugged a most loving, tender hug.

While this was happening, a baby girl (perhaps one or one-and-a-half) was squirming excitedly in her mother’s arms, never once taking her little eyes off the wonderful sight of her returning father. The man said, “Hi, baby girl!” as he gently took the child from her mother. He quickly kissed her face all over and then held her close to his chest while rocking her from side to side. The little girl instantly relaxed and simply laid her head on his shoulder, motionless in pure contentment.

After several moments, he handed his daughter to his oldest son and declared, “I’ve saved the best for last!” and proceeded to give his wife the longest, most passionate kiss I ever remember seeing. He gazed into her eyes for several seconds and then silently mouthed. “I love you so much!” They stared at each other’s eyes, beaming big smiles at one another, while holding both hands.

For an instant they reminded me of newlyweds, but I knew by the age of their kids that they couldn’t possibly be. I puzzled about it for a moment then realized how totally engrossed I was in the wonderful display of unconditional love not more than an arm’s length away from me. I suddenly felt uncomfortable, as if I was invading something sacred, but was amazed to hear my own voice nervously ask, “Wow! How long have you two been married?

“Been together fourteen years total, married twelve of those.” he replied, without breaking his gaze from his lovely wife’s face. “Well then, how long have you been away?” I asked. The man finally turned and looked at me, still beaming his joyous smile. “Two whole days!”

Two days? I was stunned. By the intensity of the greeting, I had assumed he’d been gone for at least several weeks – if not months. I know my expression betrayed me.

I said almost offhandedly, hoping to end my intrusion with some semblance of grace (and to get back to searching for my friend), “I hope my marriage is still that passionate after twelve years!”

The man suddenly stopped smiling.

He looked me straight in the eye, and with forcefulness that burned right into my soul, he told me something that left me a different person. He told me, “Don’t hope, friend… decide!” Then he flashed me his wonderful smile again, shook my hand and said, “God bless!”

- By Michael D. Hargrove and Bottom Line Underwriters, Inc.

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